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Among the noble morality is: connecting rope silaturrahmi of people who want to decide, as the brothers relatives mandatory for you to connect kinship with them. If they try to decide, then sambunglah back the rope.And do not say: "who wants to connect it I'll connect it too!", As this is not a way to connect kinship ties, as has been the Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam sabdakan:

ليس الواصل بالمكافئ إنما الواصل من إذا قطعت رحمها وصلها

"It is not people who connect kinship because expecting a reply, but the people who connect kinship is that continues to connect it dikala people decide [1]"

There was one who asked the Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam and said: Messenger of Allah, verily I have relatives relatives, I continue to point kinship with them is they actually decide, I was always doing good but they apply to me bad, I also sympathize them while they do not care about me. Then he said:

إن كنت كما قلت فكأنما تسفهم المل ولا يزال معك من الله ظهير
عليهم ما دمت على ذلك

"If you did this correctly, you seem to have entered the tedium of themselves, and will continue to exist for you helpers of Allah Subhanahu wa Ta'ala as long as you continue to do so [2]".

The meaning of "you have entered the tedium of themselves" which are: you like to put dust or hot ashes in their mouths. I wish the business to continue to connect kinship of people who try to decide, including the behavior of the noble morality, so will attempt to connect kinship of people who also connect it into the category of behavior. And someone who wants to connect kinship with you and he is the brother of kin, then to her two rights: first: Right as the relatives, the second:
The right to receive a reply.

As the Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam:

من صنع إليكم معروفا فكافئوه

"Whoever did ma'ruf to you, then give him a reward [3]".

And so, you have to give rights to people who hold it, ie, prevent it. And do not you say: he did not give me then I will not give him. Then, should you want to forgive people who mendzalimi you, the people who belittle or diminish your rights , either by you or hostile
by not fulfilling its obligations to you.

And tyranny is centered on two things: first: Exceed the limit, the second: Denial. Whether he exaggerated on you by hitting, take the treasure, and apart mengkoyak your honor. Or he denies you, thus preventing yourself from taking your right. Meanwhile, the perfection of a person he should be willing to forgive the man who molested her. But the attitude was taken when he has the ability to retaliate. So, you are willing to give him forgiveness despite having the ability to seek revenge because it is caused by a number of things:

First: Expect forgiveness from Allah Subhanahu wa Ta'ala and His love. Because people are willing to forgive and seek for peace or do good, then the reward will be borne by Allah Subhanahu wa Ta'ala

Second: In order to improve the feeling of love and affection that has existed between you and your friends. Because, if you retaliate sendainya crimes with which semisalnya, would have continued hostility between the two of you. However, if you reply to kejahatanya to do good to him, surely he will do good to your back, and of course he would feel ashamed to you. Allah Subhanahu wa Ta'ala says:

ولا تستوي الحسنة ولا السيئة ادفع بالتي هي أحسن فإذا الذي بينك وبينه عداوة كأنه ولي حميم

"And it is not as good and evil. Repel (evil) with a better way, then suddenly people among you there is enmity between him and seems to have become a very loyal friend. "(Surah Fushshilat: 34)

So, in attitude to forgive when we have the ability to retaliate, this includes akhak noble. However, on condition that there must be kemashlahatan in it. If the attitude is still causing evil deeds of those who forgive, then it is advisable for him not to forgive him. Because Allaah has set a condition, saying:

فمن عفا وأصلح

"So whoever forgives and do good." (Surat ash-Syuura ': 40)

Namely there is kemashlahatan in it. As if it could cause crime to him or even cause other crimes, so in this case we say to him: do not give him sorry! As an example of forgiveness that wicked person, if he could have forgiven it actually causes it to constantly repeated actions such fasiknya. So, do not give him forgiveness in such a condition is certainly more mainstream, or even could become a liability for us.

And among the noble morality is: Dutiful to both parents, this is because the amount of rights that exist in both. Because Allaah does not establish a right for someone, which is right under his right and the right of His Messenger sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam directly except for the two parents. Allah Subhanahu wa Ta'ala says:

واعبدوا الله ولا تشركوا به شيئا وبالوالدين إحسانا

"Worship Allah and do not ascribe him with nothing. and do good to parents, the father "(Surah an-Nisa ': 36)

And the right messenger is contained in the command to worship Allaah. Because, it will not happen with a true worship until a servant willing to fulfill its rights to the Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam; that is with love and follow the path He sallallaahu' alaihi wa sallam. And this includes the word of God:

واعبدوا الله ولا تشركوا به شيئا وبالوالدين إحسانا

"Worship Allah and do not ascribe him with nothing. and do good to his two ibubapak "(Surah an-Nisa ': 36)

So, how can a slave to worship Allaah if not from the instructions of His Messenger sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam?!.

So, if only he worshiped Allah Subhanahu wa Ta'ala in accordance with the guidance of the Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam, then he has fulfilled his right. The later is a right for both parents. Both parents have tired of educating children, especially the mother. Allah Subhanahu wa Ta'ala says:

ووصينا الإنسان بوالديه إحسانا حملته أمه كرها ووضعته كرها

"We have enjoined on man to do good to parents, father, mother conceived him with difficulty, and gave birth to her with difficulty (to Allah)." (Surah al-Ahqaaf: 15).

And in another verse Allah also says:

ووصينا الإنسان بوالديه حملته أمه وهنا على وهن

"And we were ordered to man (do good) to two of their parents; his mother had conceived him in a weakened state that increase steadily." (Surah Luqman: 14).

Thus, a housewife is tired when pregnant with his child, childbirth, and postpartum. And he was more dear to her baby than the father. Therefore, he is the figure most entitled to good treatment and service of his son than the father.

Someone said to the Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam: Messenger of Allah! Who is the person who most deserve good treatment from me?, Prophet replied: "Your mother", he asked again: Then who?, Prophet replied: "Your mother", he again asked: Then who else?, Prophet again replied: "Your mother ", then the Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam said to the fourth time:" Then your father [4] ".

And a father would also feel fatigue when educating their children. He will feel tired dikala children feel tired, and he will feel happy dikala them happy. He will continue to strive with all sorts of ways to get pleasure, peace and the feasibility of life for her baby. He was willing to cross paths in the mountains and deserts are barren for the sake of getting a bite of rice for himself and for his children.

Thus, each of the two both have rights. Though you do anything to pay it, surely you will not be able to fulfill it.For that Allah Subhanahu wa Ta'ala says:

وقل رب ارحمهما كما ربياني صغيرا

"And say:" O my Lord, love them both, as they both had trained as a child I "." (Surah al-Israa ': 24).

Thus, their rights have been passed, where they both have taught you as a child, when you first have not been able to do something beneficial or harmful. Thus, the obligation for you now is to devote to both. And devotion to both his legal parents is obligatory 'ain for every individual with a consensus or agreement of the scholars.Hence the Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam more mendahulukannya of jihad in Allah's way, as in a hadith narrated by Ibn Mas'ud: He said: I asked the Messenger sallallaahu' alayhi wa sallam: Messenger of Allah!Deeds are most beloved to Allah? The Prophet said: "Prayers in time", I asked again: Then what?, Prophet replied: "Dutiful to both parents", I asked again: Then what else? The Prophet replied: "Jihad in Allah's way [5]".

Both parents are fathers and mothers. The grandfather and grandmother and they both also have rights, but rights are not the same as the rights of both parents. Because grandparents do not feel too tired, did not participate in the care and attention to them directly as experienced by both parents. So, devoted to the grandparents was limited to just connect kinship. The worship is real, then it belongs only to the parents alone.

Then: What is worship? Dutiful meaning: Connecting kindness and prevent crime in accordance with ability.Connecting them with the kindness to give the treasure, with the help and happy both; such act sweet face, kind speech, and the main act as well with everything that can please both. Therefore, the most powerful words in this case is mandatory for a child to help both parents if it is not harmful to the child. But if it could harm it, it is not obligatory for him to help them, cor. Except in circumstances that are very important.

To that we say: Surely obedience to parents is an obligation, as long as it is beneficial to both and do not cause things that are harmful to the child. As if it could harm it, whether it could harm their religion, such as both parents told him to leave the duties and carry out something that is forbidden, so in this case there is no obligation to obey both. Or maybe it could harm his body, then in this case is also not mandatory for him to obey both.

The devotion to both the property, then it is obligatory for a child to devote to kedunya by giving property to both, although with a lot of money if it is not harmful to the child and is not a treasure that he needed. And especially for a father, he is entitled to a portion of his property at will as long as it is not Dangerous and exaggeration.

And if we observe the human condition at the present time, we would find most of them do not want to devote to his parents, and even he even rebelled against both. While his companions his own he wants to do good. He does not get bored sitting around with them. But if he sat with his father or his mother for a moment during the day, you will find it bored, as if he was sitting on top of coals. Thus, a child like that is not dedicated, but
filial piety is the feel roomy chest when with his mother and father, he wants to help both in the presence of both of them, he will work with enthusiasm as strong as his ability, to get the good pleasure of his parents.

As most people say: "Dutiful is a debt". Truly a dutiful child in addition he will get a great reward in the hereafter, he will also receive balasanya in the life of this world. So, dutiful and rebellious as people say is "a debt", please owe, but pay off, if you present for both meetings, surely your children will worship thee. However, if you rebel against them, surely your children will be disobedient to you too.

And very many of the stories tells about a man devoted to his parents, the children were also devoted to him.And so did the stories about someone who is disobedient to his parents, who all showed that if a person is disobedient to his father or his mother, surely the children would be disobedient to her also.

And among the noble morality as well, namely: Silaturrahmi or connect kinship.

There is a difference between the parents and other relatives in your relationship with them. As for his relatives, it is right for them is to connect kinship. As for both parents, then the rights obligatory for both is to devote to them both. And of course, dutiful behavior of higher social status than just connecting kinship. Since worship is an overflow of kindness, while connecting kinship objective that is not broken rope. For that, people who do not worship known as: the sinners, while those who do not connect kinship referred to as: a breaker!.

However, connecting kinship is also obligatory, is being decided is a curse because the arrival and obstruction of a person to enter heaven. Allah Subhanahu wa Ta'ala says:

فهل عسيتم إن توليتم أن تفسدوا في الأرض وتقطعوا أرحامكم <> أولئك الذين لعنهم الله فأصمهم وأعمى أبصارهم

"So is it to be if you're in power you will make mischief in the land and sever your ties of kinship? They's the people who dila'nati God and His deafened their ears and their eyes blinded him." (Surah Muhammad: 22 & 23)

The Prophet sallallaahu 'alaihi wa sallam said:

لا يدخل الجنة قاطع

"It will not enter Paradise who decide kinship [6]".

And DI comes in the Qur'an and as-Sunnah with Muthlak form.

And everything that has not been restricted by the Shari'ah, like problems where tuk storage property, then the 'urf was restricted. In accordance with this, then the matter should be returned to the 'urf her. So, what is called by the surrounding communities as a way to connect kinship, then it is included silaturrahmi. And what they call the breaker kinship, then it is referred to as DI breaker. And this of course varies according to different situations, conditions, time, place, and different peoples.

::: If only people in a state indigent or lack of, are you someone who is, and his relatives are also poor people.So how to connect to their kinship is to give them assistance in accordance with the circumstances and your abilities.

::: And if people are in a state of well-established, they all were in good shape economically. So by visiting them in the morning or evening, it also includes a way to connect kinship.

In our time, the relationship between human beings silaturrahmi very rarely applied. This was caused by their busy with work and their own needs, and also because their activities enumerated by each other. While connecting silaturrahmi perfect relationship, you should look for news about them, how are their children, and pay attention to the problems being faced by them. But it is unfortunate at all, actions and deeds like this has lost some where. As perfectly dutiful behavior has also been missing from most humans.

Resources:

From E-book titled Makarimul Morals , Shaykh Ibn Uthaymeen rahimahullah [translated by: Abu Musa al-Atsarî]

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1. Issued by Bukhari, No (5991) in Kitaabul Adab.

2. Issued by Imam Muslim, No. (22) in Kitaabul Beer Wash. Shilah.

3. Issued by Abu Daud, No (1672) in Kitaabuz Zakat, and No (5109) in Kitaabul Adab. And Nasa'i, No (2566) in Kitaabuz Zakat, chapter (72). And this hadith contained in the book Shahiihul Jaami ', No (6021).

4. Issued by Bukhari, No (5971), in Kitaabul Adab, Muslim, No. (1 & 2) at Wash. Shilah Kitaabul Beer.

5. Issued by Bukhari, No (527) in Kitaabu Mawaaqiitish Shalaah, Muslim, No (139) in Kitaabul Iimaan.

6. Issued by Bukhari, No (5983) in Kitaabul Adab, Muslim, No. (19) in Kitaabul Beer Wash. Shilah.

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